I auditioned for Springboard because at the time I thought I was going to be needing a job, so that was huge. I also wanted to look new places and experience new things in reference to getting a new job. I have been tunnel vision on Chicago because I have been there for so long. I wanted to get out of my comfort zone and see some other things so I could make an educated choice.
How would you describe your experience so far?
It’s been great, I’ve learned a ton. I’ve met amazing people. The entire experience has been awesome.
Do you feel like a dancer and what does that mean to you?
Yes, I feel like a dancer. I have felt like a dancer from the first moment I took class at twelve years old. A ballet teacher once said to me that we shouldn’t define ourselves by what we do. I contemplated that for many years, it bothered me because dance encompasses everything about me. I am a dancer.
Do you ever struggle with confidence issues? How do you deal with confidence issues when they sneak up on you?
Yes, I struggle with confidence issues. I am a type A personality so I don’t struggle to the point that it effects my dancing or my learning process but like every human being I have moments of insecurity, moments of questioning myself. I don’t have trouble bringing myself out of that. I look to people I trust when I have those moments.
What do you wish you had known about dancing that you instead had to figure out?
(Laughs) There is a long, long list. Besides the technical things of course because we could go on forever. I wish I had known that trusting people and trusting the relationships in the studio would help me become a better dancer. Instead of being scared of the relationships in the studio. For a long time I was the youngest and really quiet, I didn’t communicate with people. As I’ve gotten older I realize that the communication and the openness really feeds my dancing and allows me to grow.
How would you describe your relationship with your body?
I can honestly say that unlike most dancers I truly love my body. I love and respect my body. I take very good care of my body. I am very careful about what I eat and I get constant care. I go to the chiropractor, I get massages. I’m still a dancer, I have those moments and many of them that I look in the mirror and I don’t think that I am ideal. I love my body, I truly do. I always wish that I was thinner. It’s a dancer thing.
How does that relationship impact your art?
I feel good about my body and I am very confident in my body. I feel confident that my body is strong and well trained so therefore I feel it allows me a lot of freedom in my dancing. It allows me to be fearless about approaching things...movement, choreography, technique.
What do you do on a daily basis to support your dancing?
Everything I do physically supports my dancing. I teach and I choreograph and through this I am always learning about myself as a dancer. I don’t go outside of dancing as far as hobbies and things like that. Financially, I teach I choreograph, I run a company. I do a lot of things to allow me the freedom to come to something like Springboard.
What is your favorite part of working with young people?
It is so gratifying. THere is nothing like seeing someone accomplish something they thought they couldn’t do and knowing that you were a part of it. Those are huge life lessons. So when you see a kid overcome something and see the results of their hard work. That is a lesson weather they dance or not that they will carry with them. and just the impact I get to have on their lives. They look up to me, they look to me for things.
What is the most challenging?
Sometimes I get resentful because I give so much of myself to them, and they’re kids, so 90% of the time they are very grateful (laughs) maybe 75% of the time. But if they are grateful or not I think they don’t realize how much I give them of myself. Not that I need praise but they don’t realize that I think of them at night. I think about them first thing in the morning. 'How come Jaime couldn’t turn out her leg today or why couldn’t she point her foot that day?' It consumes my thoughts. Sometimes they give me what I call poopoo face in the studio and it hurts me so deeply because I give so much of myself and my time. You learn later in life how grateful you really are.
What about today's environment feeds your work? What is your favorite things about dancing and creating now?
In the last five years of my life I feel like I’ve had so much growth in myself. Between the age of 25-30 I’ve learned so much about who I am and what I want, what is important to me. Those things effect my work and I choreograph about those things. I’ve also been able to organize relationships I’ve had. At the time they seemed so stressful but now I feel better able to observe and organize them. The ability to organize them allows them to be more a part of my work because I can understand them and the emotions that went with them.
What do you find the most challenging?
Funding being cut for the arts. That is the scariest thing for me. And in teaching parents always question ‘should my kid really do this, can they make a living at it?’ It is scary to encourage kids to do it as the funding goes to the wayside.
Why did you choose dance as you medium?
I didn’t choose it, it chose me. There was never a choice.
When did you first feel that way?
I felt it in the first couple of months when I was twelve years old. This is what I want to to and I am going to do it for the rest of my life.
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